Issue #46: Dealing with Doubts
Learn about why we struggle, what it looks like and how we can deal with it
Dear mental health advocate,
Do you have a lot of doubts in your life? About your skills, your life, certain decisions or the future? That’s probably difficult to manage. I know all about it. So, I thought it would make sense to help you guys out a bit more what to do and how to manage a life and a brain that is full of doubts. So, in today’s free edition of The Present Psychologist Paper I will hopefully help you battle your doubts a bit more!
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Dealing with Doubts
How is your personality and brain when it comes to uncertainty and choices? Are you okay with it when you have to make a plan and decide on what to do? Some of us are worriers. We keep ruminating and turning every situation up and down in our head. We sketch scenarios and try to understand all the possible outcomes that could potentially occur. I want you to think about yourself right now. Would you consider yourself a person that has a lot of doubts? It’s a broad term, so it is likely you have a few. Everyone has them from time to time. But not everyone suffers in a similar fashion. So, do you feel like doubts constantly complicate your life and stand in the way of your mental health? Then it would be good to understand how to deal with them.
What are doubts?
Doubt can be considered a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction about something. It can arise in various aspects of life—decisions, beliefs, relationships, and even about oneself. Doubt can manifest as hesitation, skepticism, or a lack of confidence in a particular situation or belief. Ultimately, doubts serve as a mechanism for introspection and analysis. They prompt us to reassess situations, seek more information, and make informed decisions. While doubts can be uncomfortable, they also offer an opportunity for growth and learning, pushing us to critically evaluate our beliefs and choices.
What can cause having doubts?
There are various reasons why people in generally have doubts. Some are because of not all facts are present or because certain situations cannot be controlled. In other cases, doubts can occur as a result of psychological struggles that can be based on personality or negative experiences. Here’s a list of some causes explained:
Uncertainty: When faced with unknown or ambiguous situations, doubts arise because we lack information or clarity.
Complexity: Some decisions or situations are intricate, making it challenging to determine the right course of action, leading to doubt.
Fear of failure: The fear of making a wrong decision or failing can generate doubt, causing hesitation and indecision.
Contradictory information: Conflicting information or opinions can create doubts, making it challenging to know the truth or the best course of action.
Past experiences: Negative past experiences can contribute to doubts by creating a sense of apprehension or skepticism about similar situations.
Lack of confidence: Low self-esteem or a lack of confidence in one's abilities can lead to doubts about one's capabilities to handle specific situations or tasks.
Changing circumstances: As situations evolve, doubts can arise due to the need to adapt or make decisions in unfamiliar or changing environments.
How do doubts present themselves?
Doubts can seem innocent at first, but you have to realize that if they really make you feel stuck, the symptoms can be overwhelming. As our bodies and minds are strongly intertwined, most of the time issues will not only have a mental component, but also physical and in cases even social. It’s good to be aware and know that the effects can be strong and stand in the way of your daily routine. Here are some examples how having doubts can manifest in your life:
Physical symptoms: while dealing with stress, doubts can lead to physical tension in the body, causing muscle tightness, headaches, or even stomach discomfort. If you deal with persistent doubts it does not only mentally drain you, it also makes you feel tired and without energy. As well, it is pretty common that there are difficulties with falling asleep or staying asleep because you have racing thoughts and worries. Finally, some individuals may experience changes in appetite, either by overeating or eating less.
Mental symptoms: doubts often trigger anxiety, leading to a constant feeling of worry or unease about the future or specific situations. You can constantly ruminate or overanalyze situations which can cause a cycle of negative thoughts. Doubts can erode self-confidence and self-esteem, making it challenging to trust your own judgment or abilities. Excessive doubts sometimes triggers indecisiveness and then it is hard to take action. It often can make you feel frustrated and irritated.
Social symptoms: doubts might cause you to withdraw from social interactions, preferring being alone to avoid judgment. Your communication skills can be affected because it is more challenging to express yourself clearly or confidently. It might even lead to you avoiding certain social situations or responsibilities due to doubts about your ability to handle them. Finally, sometimes having doubts can lead to strained relationships, as they can cause misunderstandings or conflicts.
So what can I do about it?
I have said it before, it is human to have doubts. But you need to reflect and become aware whether your doubts are manageable and in your eyes ‘normal’, or if they are really standing in the way of your happiness. If you feel like you need to do something about your chronic doubts, then it could help to try and do the following things:
Recognize and accept doubt: Understand that doubt is a normal feeling. Acknowledge it without letting it overwhelm you.
Seek information: Gather more information or facts related to what's causing doubt. Sometimes, doubts are there because you do not have all the facts.
Talk it out: Discuss your doubts with someone you trust—a friend, family member, mentor, or therapist. Verbalizing doubts can help you gain perspective.
Reflect and evaluate: Take time to introspect. Analyze the source of your doubt. Are there underlying fears or concerns that need addressing?
Challenge your doubts: Ask yourself if your doubts are based on evidence or assumptions. Sometimes, they might stem from irrational fears or past experiences.
Break it down: If a decision feels overwhelming, break it into smaller, manageable parts. Tackle each part step by step.
Learn from past experiences: Reflect on situations where doubts were resolved positively. Use those instances to remind yourself that doubts can be overcome.
Trust yourself: Have confidence in your abilities and judgment. Remind yourself of your strengths and past successes.
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My name is Alf Lokkertsen and I am a psychologist and writer, creating mental health content for you. My passion is to raise awareness about topics related to psychology, as it has helped me greatly in my personal life. I strongly believe that many problems could be avoided or dealt with better if everyone had some in-depth psychology knowledge.
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